on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
