My room smells like vodka and shame
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Randomize
