You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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