so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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