Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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