how can u be prego again
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize
