Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize