life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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