There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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