hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
