Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
