whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
so that wasnt chicken after all
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
