she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
we made out on top of his cat.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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