Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
