just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
