found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
