She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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