i think my tv is drunk
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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