She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
