So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
