They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
