So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
