your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize