Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%

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(415): If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49% http://tfl.nu/98jc

Replies (14) Good night (893) Bad night (2291)
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(805): View more from California

all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.

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(805): all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl. http://tfl.nu/c5of

Replies (14) Good night (877) Bad night (4033)
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(905): View more from Toronto

just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.

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(905): just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped. http://tfl.nu/8nmk

Replies (35) Good night (1027) Bad night (10200)
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(804): View more from Virginia

god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.

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(804): god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away. http://tfl.nu/mycs

Replies (12) Good night (1144) Bad night (4100)
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(817): View more from Texas

well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while

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(817): well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while http://tfl.nu/ax7b

Replies (33) Good night (1616) Bad night (4938)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.

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(412): I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra. http://tfl.nu/7xhn

Replies (52) Good night (9732) Bad night (1260)
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(631): View more from New York

judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.

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(631): judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way. http://tfl.nu/a0to

Replies (2) Good night (2744) Bad night (841)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking

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(401): I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking http://tfl.nu/uwdq

Replies (4) Good night (2101) Bad night (925)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.

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(803): I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it. http://tfl.nu/1xwb

Replies (12) Good night (4332) Bad night (700)
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(817): View more from Texas

i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago

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(817): i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago http://tfl.nu/3uom

Replies (7) Good night (585) Bad night (1203)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.

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(267): I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses. http://tfl.nu/97k7

Replies (3) Good night (1146) Bad night (369)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him

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(413): New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him http://tfl.nu/45u3

Replies (5) Good night (643) Bad night (323)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked

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(202): Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked http://tfl.nu/79sc

Replies (1) Good night (645) Bad night (342)
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(760): View more from California

Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.

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(760): Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove. http://tfl.nu/hs8c

Replies (8) Good night (1614) Bad night (412)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.

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(703): I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat. http://tfl.nu/wce9

Replies (1) Good night (217) Bad night (350)

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