im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
