I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize