my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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