What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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