Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
