dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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