so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
