You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
