quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
