Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize