Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
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