Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
try to milk me bitch
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