I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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