Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
