Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize