Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
