No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
