we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
