i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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