I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize
