It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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