they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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