i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
i now understand why vodka
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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