Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize