Is it normal to miss your booty call?
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Randomize