Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
